Cele|bitchy |
- Hot Mutant Friday: The Evolution of Dong
- Angelina Jolie complains about the American educational system
- Ivanka Trump on only taking two weeks maternity leave: “I have meetings scheduled”
- John Edwards indicted for misusing campaign funds, his mistress dumps him
- Pink gave birth to a healthy baby girl, named her Willow Sage Hart
- Kate Hudson & Matt Bellamy are fighting over money, pre-nups & weight gain
- Shia LeBeouf: Megan Fox’s “woman-empowerment” didn’t jive with Michael Bay’s style
- Kate Middleton kissed a girl once when she was 14 years old
- Leonardo DiCaprio is already screwing around on Blake Lively, obviously
- Rosario Dawson wants to get into Colin Farrell’s Irish panties
Hot Mutant Friday: The Evolution of Dong Posted: 03 Jun 2011 09:02 AM PDT Michael Fassbender. Michael is on the cusp. Granted, many, many people know who he is. But after X-Men: First Class comes out and makes a bajillion dollars, Michael will be a bona fide movie star, and everybody's going to want a piece of the Fassdong. I saw him first! Not really, but I have been enamored for several years now. I think it was his jaw line that first won me over. Then it was his ginger. Then his lovely Irish accent. Then his cute butt. And then his acting chops, and finally, his dong. That's where I am now. I know, I know. I've been bitching and moaning about this Zoe Kravitz thing, but the truth of the matter is that I like my dudes a little bit dirty, skeevy and perverted, which is how Fassdong has been coming across lately. Zoe's not underage, she's just… I guess she's just "easy" for him, especially after his somewhat crazy, hyper-dramatic relationship with his ex, Sunawin Andrews. Sigh… just don't yell at me and let me enjoy My Man, okay? Here, I’ll share. James McAvoy. Good husband, good father, good actor, glorious bulge, gorgeous Scottish brogue and beautiful blue eyes. I'm worried that James's version of Professor X will be a little too… smarmy and goody-two-shoes. But I have high hopes that Prof. X was, much like James, a total badass in his youth. Fingers crossed. Oh, and I seriously don’t think he’s January Jones’s baby-daddy. I just don’t see it. P.S. On the McAvoy & Fassbender tip, Allison @ PopSugar sent me her absolutely hilarious interview with the two dudes. There’s so much beauty contained in this video, I can’t even speak. Fassbender jokes about boning McAvoy’s wife, he talks about “the ginger community” and how gingers are awesome, and McAvoy is just gorgeous. Liev Schreiber. He was in that X-Men Origins: Wolverine movie with Hugh Jackman - he played Victor Creed/Sabertooth. I've had a crush on Liev for years and years - I can remember being obsessed with him a decade ago. I like my dudes BIG, and this one is a giant. So, so tall, with that deep, rich voice and… gah! He likes blondes. He would never go for me. Sadness. Still, I can appreciate him. Nicholas Hoult. After staring at photos of little Nicholas Hoult (the little boy from About A Boy, all grown up!), I finally understood it. First, that although I'm totally creepy for lusting after him, it's okay because it's all in the name of "research." Two, Nicholas Hoult is our new Jonathan Rhys-Meyers. Hoult has the crazy-eyes. He has the look, that he could be up for anything, with anybody. He's sexy in the way that women love, but there's some feminine beauty in the mix too. Anyway, in X-Men: First Class, he plays Beast. That's pretty hot. Sir Ian McKellan. Ah, Sir Ian. Is it okay to have some lust for a little old Englishman who loves dong just as much as us? Sure! Because it's about his voice. And his talent. He's supremely talented, incredibly funny and witty, and he's got that beautiful, rich voice. Ian could sell me anything with that voice. I think that’s why they chose Michael Fassbender to play the young Magneto - Magneto needs a beautiful, powerful voice, and Fassie has it. Kevin Durand. Kevin was in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. He played Blob, or The Blob, or whatever you want to call him. As you know, I've been a fan of Kevin's since Lost. His villain was just so… erotic. I had dreams about him. I keep telling you, I like 'em with a healthy dose of skeeve. Edi Gathegi (By CB): You may remember Gathegi as an underdeveloped (weren’t they all) menacing vampire from the Twilight movies. He wasn’t all that hot with the freaky eyes and the dreds, but when you take off the contacts his eyes are entrancing, not creepy. Gathegi plays Darwin in X Men: First Class and I don’t know much about him but I remember this video on Wonderwall where someone scared the crap out of him by jumping out of his closet. He took it all incredibly well and was laughing about it afterwards. He even had some quick reflexes. Hugh Jackman (By CB): We’ve featured Hugh on HGF plenty of times in the past, and what would an X Men post be without Wolverine? I adore Hugh and wish we saw him in more leading roles. He’s a dedicated family man, a fabulous entertainer, and has one of the buffest bodies around. He doesn’t take himself too seriously either. Also, you can pick any random photo of this guy and he looks incredible every time. (Sometimes he’s a bit too orange, but I’ll overlook it.) Kevin Bacon (By CB): It’s so nice to see some press about Bacon again now that he’s on X Men: First Class. I would say he hasn’t aged since Footloose, but that’s not true. He looks all of 42 and he’s 52, can you believe it? He’s also in no way smoothed, pulled or plumped out and he could have easily succumbed to plastic surgery considering that his friends and coworkers are doing it. Kevin has been with Kyra Sedgwick for 22 years and we’ve never heard a hint of a scandal about him. I find him incredibly sexy in a “sh*t I wish he was single” kind of way. You know he’d never go there, though. James Marsden (By CB): I’ve only seen this guy in Hop and he was way too convincing as a goofy loser, so it’s hard for me to find him sexy. (As opposed to most HGF posts where we pick the guys we cover, we just divided the X-Men players up and I got Marsden by default.) Looking over his photos I get it, though. He’s incredibly good looking in a “high school sports star” kind of way. Plus, his smile just lights up the place. There are even photos of him at the airport with that goofy grin. He looks like a good guy. Alan Cumming (by Bedhead) As Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler in X2, he is anything but attractive, but I have nothing but pure adoration for Alan Cumming himself. He can work just about any outfit on the red carpet, and that smile as well as those dimples and mischievous eyes could melt my little black heart in a moment. Ryan Reynolds (by Bedhead) As a qualifier, this guy is really not my type at all, but he’s certainly got a legion of fans who drooled over him as Wade Wilson/Deadpool in X-Men Origins: Wolverine and will certainly do so for the upcoming Deadpool movie. Not that I’d kick a set of abs like that out of bed though… Patrick Stewart (by Bedhead) As Charlex Xavier/Professor X in several of the movies (and as the voice in many video games), Stewart brought the exact type and amount of gravitas that the role demanded. His authoritative voice and no-nonsense demeanor could win compliance from even the non-comic book fans out there. Also, I sort of want to spit polish that shiny head of his. Taylor Kitsch (by Bedhead) As Remy LeBeau/Gambit in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Kitsch was able to shed those pretty boy good looks on a temporary basis. Not for long though, and he really should work on some new poses because even hot guys could use some variation on the red carpet. Lately, he shocked his fans by chopping off his locks, and I can’t decide whether I like his “before” or “after” look better. Ben Foster (by Bedhead) As Warren Worthington III/Angel in X-Men: The Last Stand, Foster has given us merely one of a line of diverse performances in movies and television. He’s an atypical cutie and has survived the task of being Zoe Kravitz’s boyfriend before she moved onto Michael Fassbender. Hopefully, he’s not too terribly broken up over it because they are plenty of us out here to pick up the leftovers. Photos courtesy of Fame, WENN, Vogue, Essence, Vanity Fair, GQ, Details, Esquire, Flaunt, The Telegraph, Entertainment Weekly, Google Images. |
Angelina Jolie complains about the American educational system Posted: 03 Jun 2011 09:01 AM PDT Angelina Jolie has a pretty big interview in The Independent UK today. Jolie talks about lots of stuff where… if someone else said it, I'm sure it would be a non-story. Because it's Angelina, though, I'm sure this is going to be a really long day. I kind of thought that possibly made-up interview in The Telegraph was uncontroversial too, but then people started talking about how Brad Pitt is abusive and such. I just don't get it. Anyway, you can read Jolie's interview in two parts, here and here. Here are some hightlights:
[From The Independent UK - two articles] I guess the stuff about the education system is going to be controversial…? I can never tell with the loonies on either side. My thoughts on Angelina's education comments: while I appreciate that she was trying to be diplomatic about it, and that she blamed the structure and the machine rather than individual schools and teachers who are struggling, I still don't think Angelina is in the best position to complain. Yes, I've read Jonathan Kozol and I keep meaning to watch that documentary about the DC schools. I get that there are huge problems in the American public school system. But have any of the Jolie-Pitt kids ever tried public school? No! She's always done the tutor thing or sent them to the Lycee schools (which are private). I feel like she's blaming the education system for her own vagabond parenting style. |
Ivanka Trump on only taking two weeks maternity leave: “I have meetings scheduled” Posted: 03 Jun 2011 08:56 AM PDT
[From In Touch, print edition, June 13, 2011] She’ll have plenty of help and if she wants to take just two weeks off that’s her prerogative. Maybe she’ll be working from home or skyping into her meetings anyway. I found an earlier interview that Ivanka did with People Magazine in which she repeated the claim that she loved salt bagels (I love them too, they’re my favorite!) and said that she was in awe that babies took so much work. It was kind of funny, actually, and Ivanka revealed that she’ll probably set up a nursery in the office, which sounds like a good compromise.
[From People via CNN] It would be nice if more working moms could have the luxury of setting up nurseries next to the offices and having baby nurses. Now I get why she can go back to work so soon. Ivanka is shown on 5/12/11 and 5/5/11. Credit: WENN.com |
John Edwards indicted for misusing campaign funds, his mistress dumps him Posted: 03 Jun 2011 08:44 AM PDT
I’m glad this is moving forward and that Edwards will have to answer for getting a campaign donor to fund his coverup. He’s allegedly still hitting up that same elderly benefactor for money to help with his defense, according to the Enquirer. The National Enquirer scooped everyone for months on the John Edwards secret lovechild scandal, and they have more insider details on how Edwards is faring now. They say that his space cadet mistress, Rielle Hunter, has all but abandoned him and told him that she doesn’t want to help him with this case at all. She dumped his ass and he’s trying to cut her off from the money. It’s all too predictable and sad, considering that his cancer stricken wife didn’t get to see Edwards get his ass handed to him before she died. Here’s a segment from the Enquirer article:
[From The National Enquirer, print edition, June 13, 2011] I doubt Edwards will end up going to jail, but at least Rielle put her foot down and he’s facing some consequences for lying and scamming. Stories last year had him drunkenly trolling for women in college bars. Rielle was right when she called him pathetic. |
Pink gave birth to a healthy baby girl, named her Willow Sage Hart Posted: 03 Jun 2011 08:38 AM PDT This just goes to show you - when I say someone is "ready to pop" they totally are. Just days after her uncomfortable and fabulous outing in which Pink looked ready to give birth at any moment, Pink totally gave birth. To a little girl! And Pink and Carey Hart totally named their daughter after one of the Palin children. No, not Piper. Not Bristol. Nor Donner or Blixen. They named the baby girl Willow Sage!
[From People] Well, Pink was right. In the end, karma came to bite her on the ass and gave her a little girl who might turn out just like Pink. But that's the thing about parent-child karma: you never really know how it's going to turn out. While Pink and Carey are all "Motorcycles, punk, tattoos, badass" I would say that karma will treat them to a little girl who wants princess castles, ballet lessons and fluffy stuffed animals, a little girl who will totally be embarrassed by her supremely UNCOOL parents. Congratulations to Pink and Carey! Photos courtesy of Fame. |
Kate Hudson & Matt Bellamy are fighting over money, pre-nups & weight gain Posted: 03 Jun 2011 08:12 AM PDT These are some new photos of Kate Hudson and her fiancé and baby-daddy Matthew Bellamy out and about in LA yesterday. They were actually at a baseball field, watching Ryder play with his team. Lots of people have been noting that Bellamy seems to have put on some "sympathy weight" during Kate's pregnancy. I kind of love when that happens - I think it's shows that the soon-to-be mom and dad are totally bonded. Probably because I associate food with love? Yeah. Anyway, you can kind of see that Bellamy is working a gut here. And Kate is pretty big too - doesn't it seem like she got really pregnant really fast? But she's carrying much differently now than she did with Ryder. Do you remember what she looked like during her first pregnancy? It all went to her face, I swear. It was awesome. In other Kate-and-Matt news, Star Magazine has a story that I don't think much of. They're claiming that Matt and Kate are in the midst of a huge battle over money. More specifically, over the pre-nup that Kate's demanding. The source says:
[From Star Magazine, print edition] I don't believe this because I don't really think Kate gives a crap about money in general. I mean, she cares about buying things and working and stuff, but she's not one of those people who prioritize the big paychecks. Now, is it possible that they're fighting? Sure. Is it possible that Kate thinks it would be no big deal if she cheated on Matt? Sure. But it's just as likely, in my mind, that they are totally loved up and blissed out right now. |
Shia LeBeouf: Megan Fox’s “woman-empowerment” didn’t jive with Michael Bay’s style Posted: 03 Jun 2011 07:37 AM PDT Since the females of the Transformers franchise are meant to be disposable in nature, it’s sort of amazing that anyone is even bothering to compare Rosie Huntington-Whitely to her predecessor, Megan Fox. Still, it’s pretty obvious that whereas Megan was willing to throw Michael Bay under the bus at any opportunity, Rosie is just dumber than a slab of freshly poured concrete. Last week, Kaiser called Rosie out for presenting herself as the next Angelina Jolie; and many of you responded to this interview by stating that, in comparison to Rosie, Megan Fox shall be sorely missed. Well, Shia LeBeouf (and his banana) would like us all to know that Fox was anything but missed on the set of Transformers: Dark of the Moon. Although I’m not entirely sure if Shia meant to insult Fox to the degree that it ends up happening in this quote, so I’m going to leave this one wide open to your interpretation:
[From Hero Complex] Wow. Shia certainly couldn’t have been serious about “female empowerment” bit if there was a certain word (”sh-t,” most likely) that the editors felt necessary to redact. Further, the Spice Girls analogy to feminism is a complete joke, so I’m pretty sure that Shia was saying that Fox saw herself as a hopeful but ultimately disastrous crusader for female rights or some [redacted]. Ultimately, Shia’s probably being a bit too harsh for no reason, since Fox is already gone from the franchise and won’t be back. Why pull her through the muck any longer? Let this not be a statement that I feel sorry for Megan Fox because publicly badmouthing one’s boss and expecting to keep your job is, well, a bit presumptuous to say the very least. Fox was wrong to behave that way, and if she had so many problems with working under the direction of Michael Bay, then she shouldn’t have been working for him at all. Fox had already worked with Bay on the set of Bad Boys 2, so she knew what she was getting into. My feelings are that Fox really saw herself as placed upon such a lofty perch that she couldn’t possibly face negative consequences for talking trash about her boss in front of the rest of the world. As she quickly learned, she wasn’t indispensible but then again, virtually no one is irreplaceable in any job. Rosie seems much more willing to play Bay’s game though, so she might be around for awhile. Movie stills courtesy of AllMoviePhoto |
Kate Middleton kissed a girl once when she was 14 years old Posted: 03 Jun 2011 07:35 AM PDT Now that our beloved Stepford Waity is a full-fledged Duchess of Crumpets (and, incidentally, a princess), even more people from Kate's past are going to be coming forward to talk about her past. In the nine years of dating Prince William, Kate managed to have a relatively scandal-free past - there was her lingerie modeling (which is why she's a princess today), there was some report about her "mooning" cars while on a bus. And of course there's her dodgy uncle. Basically, that's all the "bad" stuff about Kate. Not so bad, right? Well, as it turns out, Waity kissed a girl. Once. When she was 14 years old. LESBIAN!!!
[From Radar and Star Magazine's print edition] Kate's denied that she had William's photo up in her dorm room - she denied it in their engagement interview. But I believe it. I've always believed that Kate had her eye on the princess prize since she was a teenager. I think she's an ambitious girl who steadily and patiently worked her way to her goal. And I do not believe she's a lesbian. But I totally believe this Jessica chick is, though. But who could have ever thought that Kate would have such a "torrid" past?! Seriously, I'm surprised her "first [lesbian] kiss" wasn't white-washed by now! The Palace really needs to get on this. |
Leonardo DiCaprio is already screwing around on Blake Lively, obviously Posted: 03 Jun 2011 07:33 AM PDT Ever since Leonardo DiCaprio and Blake Lively hugged each other on Steven Spielberg's yacht in Cannes, there have been lots of reports of all of the "other" ladies Leo has been spending time with after his split from Bar Refaeli. Sidenote: there were lots of stories of his "other" ladies while he was still with Bar too. Anyway, even though this Blake 'n Leo romance is being sold to us - HARD - it looks like Leo is still sampling a wide array of international model biscuits. My assumption: Blake is fine with it, because she thinks she gets to be the "official girlfriend". In my mind, this mindset is called "Pulling A Biel". Anyway, Star Magazine has an interesting report about how Leo spent a few days in between nuzzling Blake's bolt-ons:
[From Star Magazine, print edition] Yesterday, Lainey discussed what Leo's possible response - publicly or privately - would be to Blake's ongoing nude photo scandal. I say "scandal" when really I mean "probably one of the best things that's ever happened to her career, long-term." While Leo's general MO seems to be to keep everything low-key, without scandal, without any mainstream reports of his dirtier side, I wonder if Leo is changing it up a bit. The simple fact that Leo is with Blake for now is surprising when you look at his history. And the fact that they keep getting pap'd all over Europe, and that he's still into it? Also interesting. I think privately, Leo is definitely into the "trashy" element that Blake is currently bringing to the table, but publicly he wants to be seen as Mr. Hollywood, Mr. Mainstream, the next George Clooney/Tom Hanks-style move star. The Clooney comparison is interesting, especially since so many of you think Leo might be in the closet. Some of you think Clooney is too. I disagree on both counts. I don't think either Clooney or Leo are gay. I think they're into women (at least "women" who are physically women right now, but might not have been born that way). And I think they both like it really, really dirty. They like some "extra". So… what does this mean for Blake and Leo? Will he stick with her through this "scandal" or will he ditch her and go back to his low-key, no drama, Mr. Hollywood power player image? Or is he still enchanted by the bolt-ons, at least until the end of the summer? I don't know. It's a mystery to me. |
Rosario Dawson wants to get into Colin Farrell’s Irish panties Posted: 03 Jun 2011 06:59 AM PDT This report from Star Magazine would be a little bit more interesting if Rosario Dawson could actually manage to get a smaller, supporting part in a big-budget action film remake. Unfortunately, it came down to Rosario and Jessica Biel for Total Recall (the remake starring Colin Farrell), and somehow Biel was deemed more relevant. Shocking. Literally. Rosario and Jessica are equally irrelevant in my opinion, but Rosario is a better actress and way sexier than Biel. Anyway, Star Magazine had a story about how Rosario wanted the Total Recall part because she wants to finally, at long last, bone Colin Farrell:
[From Star Magazine, print edition] So now Rosario will just have to find another way to bone Colin. But something tells me that Jessica Biel might try to get in their first? Why oh why is Biel always put with the compulsive womanizers? Her first post-breakup costar was Gerard Butler, and now she's going to work with Colin? Let's see her try to push stories about how Colin is hard up for her and how they go on cupcake-buying trips. Ten bucks says that Colin hits it and quits it in a day, right? By the way, you've seen Colin in the trailer for the Fright Night remake, right? Um… is it okay if I say that Colin as a vampire is really, really HOT? Every time he bites someone, my biscuits squeal. |
You are subscribed to email updates from Cele|bitchy To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 |
No comments:
Post a Comment